I am 14 posts (well, I guess 13, now) from the big TEN THOUSAND.
I really wish I had something fantastic in my life to post about for it, but I’m not in the best of spaces for that, sadly. It’ll probably be a quote. Or a #things I’ve said. Or a GIF. Or, god forbid, a reblog.
There is one exciting thing coming up in my life, but I can’t hold myself to 12 posts for over a month. I’m not that strong.
If anyone has any ideas for something for me to do or talk about for this milestone, I am certainly open to suggestions. Thoughts?
In fact a mature person does not fall in love, he rises in love. The word ’fall’ is not right. Only immature people fall; they stumble and fall down in love. Somehow they were managing and standing. They cannot manage and they cannot stand – they find a woman and they are gone, they find a man and they are gone. They were always ready to fall on the ground and to creep. They don’t have the backbone, the spine; they don’t have that integrity to stand alone.
A mature person has the integrity to be alone. And when a mature person gives love, he gives without any strings attached to it: he simply gives. And when a mature person gives love, he feels grateful that you have accepted his love, not vice versa. He does not expect you to be thankful for it – no, not at all, he does not even need your thanks. He thanks you for accepting his love. And when two mature persons are in love, one of the greatest paradoxes of life happens, one of the most beautiful phenomena: they are together and yet tremendously alone; they are together so much so that they are almost one. But their oneness does not destroy their individuality, in fact, it enhances it: they become more individual.
Two mature persons in love help each other to become more free. There is no politics involved, no diplomacy, no effort to dominate. How can you dominate the person you love? Just think over it. Domination is a sort of hatred, anger, enmity. How can you think of dominating a person you love? You would love to see the person totally free, independent; you will give him more individuality. That’s why I call it the greatest paradox: they are together so much so that they are almost one, but still in that oneness they are individuals. Their individualities are not effaced – they have become more enhanced. The other has enriched them as far as their freedom is concerned.
Immature people falling in love destroy each other’s freedom, create a bondage, make a prison. Mature persons in love help each other to be free; they help each other to destroy all sorts of bondages. And when love flows with freedom there is beauty. When love flows with dependence there is ugliness.
I am not old enough to know if news was ever truthful.
All I know is that these days, it is all about telling a subset of people what they already think.
This group is bad. Cities are dangerous. Science is running around unchecked, possibly endangering you.
I remember reading an academic paper a few years ago from a think-tank that studies national crime statistics and trends. According to them, crime rates in the US have been dropping steadily since 1992, yet coverage of crime on the news and attention spent on cracking down on crime in government has only been increasing.
Imagine that. You might actually be safer now than you would have been twenty years ago. Well, that depends, of course. In fact, people of colour, especially in less affluent urban areas, experience the highest rates of victimization than any other. So, even if the rate at which crime is covered on the news actually reflected a real descent into anarchy, it is still getting it wrong. Coverage of victims of crime in the news are often white, typically affluent.
A seriously rudimentary Google search for references you might be interested in:
I digress. We were talking about Al Jazeera’s association with the ruling family of Qatar, and possible links to terrorist organizations.
Let’s assume, for argument’s sake, that news outlet A has connections to groups that might also have connections to hate groups in another part of the world. Let us further assume that news outlet A is also considered the voice of many moderate people who happen to be in the same ethnic group as those who promote hate.
Like in many situations, it isn’t comfortable to participate in any dialog with someone knowing that someone more unsavoury might be speaking in another ear.
It sure would make me feel less confused to stick my fingers in my ear and scream “lalala” at the top of my lungs. Believe me that I often want to. But I don’t. I try to hear what everyone is saying in case I’m not addressing the right things. Yes, I even pay attention to FOX.
If there’s anything I’ve learned in my personal life and seen on the international stage, it is that there are two ways to burn bridges and alienate people who might one day be your friend:
Stop being willing to talk
I know that sometimes violence happens, and I don’t believe that one should always stoically refrain from meeting it in kind. However, it is only when communication completely breaks down that I start to get really scared.
I don’t like liars. I don’t like media companies. But until both change, I have to keep listening in case there is somebody on the proverbial “other side” I am being warned about trying to tell me something.
Hey, I have an idea for what you should do in a relationship. How about you minimize your girlfriend’s interests and make her assume that to get you to be involved in her life, she has to trade for it. Because unlike what people say, it isn’t communication and sharing that relationships are built on, it’s the barter system.
Then, later, if there’s time, you can get jealous and angry at her, her friends and anyone around her because she discovers that there are other people with whom she can actually feel that her interests have intrinsic value. Because, unlike what common wisdom says, it isn’t trust and acceptance that relationships are built on, it’s petty jealousy and misdirected anger.
If you want to get bonus points, when you break up, you can marry the first other girl who looks at you. But don’t let that stop you from hurting your ex! Stir up romance with her when she’s vulnerable. Because, unlike what the officiant who married you probably said, it isn’t loyalty and dedication that relationships are built on, it’s the inexcusable lack of respect for two women you claim to care about.
To take home the trophy, though, you’re going to have to vaguely voice your disappointment in your wife, to whom you pledged your love, while unclasping your ex’s bra. Later, when your ex tries to do the honourable thing and break it off and your wife finds out that you are cheating scum and tosses you out, you should most definitely make everyone else feel guilty for what you’ve done. Because fuck what other people say about relationships, you are a magnificently horrible piece of work.
I mean, it’s no big deal, really, but I haven’t spoken to her in almost two years and she barely uses three sentences to ask for a bit of my tax information for filing a late return (we were still legally married for most of last year). No please, no “sorry to bother you” and a bog standard “thanks” in closing.
The project that I’m not allowed to talk about that I’ve been pouring my heart and soul into for the past six months is going to be launched in late October. I am so excited, because it is super cool and is going to be huge and flashy and be in the news and everything and will result in me doing a little bit of traveling for work before the holidays.
You’re like a pair of selfish children. Everything is about you and your reaction to others. When you make the effort to understand or care, it doesn’t last or you forget, thus cheapening the sentiment.
I’ve never trusted you, despite the fact that that is the whole point of our relationship.
I thought I’d grow into understanding that you had my best interests at heart, like most adults find when they get old enough. I never did. I only learned to suppress the feelings of loss and anger and disappointment so that I could get along with you. Because I don’t want to wake up one day and find that I walked away from the remaining time I have with you.
Does it worry you that I don’t miss you? Does it upset you that when I have trouble, you aren’t even on my list of people to call?
I suppose not, since you’d have to suss that out with some sense of empathy, and then stay aware of it long enough to commit it to memory.
Is there a word for when a tiny sliver of absurdly naive wishful thinking seems like it’s trying to consume you and you have to play emotional whack-a-mole with your thoughts lest the idiocy gain purchase and then explode sometime in the future like the chain of tiny landmines that it is?
I will also accept something in the form of a short phrase.