- Drunk guy: Hey, you look like Superman but not him, the other guy, with the glasses, whassisname...
- Me: Clark Kent?
- DG: Yeah, Clark Kent. Totally.
- M: Totally.
- DG: But shorter.
- M: Yeah.
- DG: You got any weed?
- M: No weed.
- DG: No worries.
- DG: You must hate kryptonite, man.
- M: Yeah.
Someone asked me a question. I was in the middle of saying “no” when I saw how crestfallen she was. So, it came out:
The celebrity crushes you are posting are just a smokescreen.
- Me: Finally, a milk that doesn't give me indigestion!
- My Body: See? I told you. You need to have calcium. HOWEVER, I WILL MAKE IT AS DIFFICULT AS POSSIBLE FOR YOU TO OBTAIN IT IN LARGE QUANTITIES!
- Me: Fuck you.
- My Body: Don't think you won't pay for that.
- Her: Well, you're a minority, too.
- Me: Yeah, but not a visible one.
- Her: Fine, you're an invisible minority.
- Me: OOOoooOOO. Boogity boogity boogity!
- Her: What the hell? You're an invisible MINORITY. You, yourself, are not invisible!
bettylies replied to your post: Why is everything closed?
At Christmas, I wished we still lived in Toronto so I could find an open Jewish deli and have matzo ball soup. Even in Toronto it’s hard to find anything open.
Chinese restaurants and a handful of bowling alleys. That’s what we do on Christmas.