Notes from a home that was ALREADY wrecked

I don’t enjoy talking smack or airing my dirty laundry in public.

However, I think a little bit of information would be useful to a lot of you who might otherwise jump to the wrong conclusions and hurt people I care about with anon hate.

My marriage is ending and it has nothing to do with anyone other than my wife and me.

She made some extremely unfortunate (and repeated) choices that both of us really regret. Things that cannot be taken back.

I still care about her, but the aftermath of what happened has led me to come to the realization that we aren’t nearly as compatible as I was leading myself to believe. This isn’t just my hurt feelings speaking, but a critical evaluation of a past full of things that I let slide. By no means do I mean to suggest that I was perfect. I have faults that would annoy many.

My main problem, however, is that I tend to love hard (pardon the pun) and maybe too often love for both people in a relationship. I forget myself. That isn’t healthy. This isn’t to say that my wife didn’t or does not continue to love me, only that the way we interacted wasn’t what both of us needed.

I asked her for a divorce and we are currently discussing what process we will follow. This choice was made BEFORE ANY OTHER CONSIDERATIONS WERE INVOLVED.

Looking for work, planning a move to New York and finding people that make me happy is the direction my life is going next.

Please get on board with me and the people in my life.

Otherwise, this is your stop.

152 Notes/ Hide

  1. tramampoline replied:
  2. whatdoyoumeanitsnotawesome said: You both have my sympathies. It’s alway sad when something ends that you thought would go on forever. Good luck to both of you in your new lives.
  3. mowgli3 said: I just wanted to offer a hug and my sympathies.
  4. panache13 said: I really hope everything works out for you. I’m on board!
  5. criticalpax said: I’m sad to hear it. Whatever prompted this, I mean. It’s sad about your marriage, of course, but it seems like you’re handling it with grace and maturity. Which is awesome. (Nice meeting you at Snark, btw!) xo
  6. absona said: I’m sorry to hear that things didn’t work out for you two. Best wishes to both you and her as you go through this and as you each explore whatever comes next in your lives.